Now & Then

So many things changed when my husband had his stroke.  So many tears from all of us over the past 5 years.

Mourning the future we planned, finding the joy in the future we have!

When I think about how he made great decisions and kept me from flying off the handle (at least sometimes) Now he does not know how to put his glasses in their holder and turn off the bedside lamp.

Then he could fix anything.  Now broken things confuse him.  I have a handyman on speed dial.

Then we talked far into the night, about our days, our frustrations, and always ended with a laugh.  Now he struggles to speak, and I struggle to understand.  But we still end the night in laughter.

Then we made all our major decisions together now I make all the decisions.

Then we took turns driving, now I do all the driving.  It was a big hurdle because for years after the stroke he wanted to drive, and it was very painful concluding that he could not drive safely.

Some things are the same we laughed then, and we laugh now.

Then sometimes we went in opposite directions, now we always go together.

To be honest we did not plan enough on certain aspects of our future.  Now we have planned everything including our burial.

Then there was a lot of noise, now things are much quieter.

Then there were plans for traveling nothing extravagant, now we stay at home.

Then we loved, now we loved.  We depended on each and we still depend on each other.